Travis's Stand Read online

  He hasn’t been the same since Bean died, either.

  “How was it?” Rae asks, half-smiling.

  I narrow my eyes and hope she’s not asking what I think she is. “How was what?”

  “You know,” she teases. “Was it weird?”

  Raising my eyebrows and trying to remain calm, I ask, “Are you trying to get me to talk about my sex life?”

  Her smile widens. “Not really, but thought I’d try.”

  “Rae,” Ace calls from behind her and she jumps.

  “Shit,” she mumbles, turning in his direction.

  “Where’s Sarah?” he asks us.

  Rae answers first. “She’s with Lacey at the bar.”

  Ace nods, turns around and goes about what he was doing.

  “What do you think Ace will say?” she asks, after he is out of view.

  “I don’t know.”

  “You’re going to eventually tell him, aren’t you?”

  Nodding, I return, “Yeah, but I’m not sure when or why. Sarah doesn’t want this. She doesn’t want me.”

  “Sarah’s young. She doesn’t know what she wants. Time and space.”

  “I know.”

  Shaking her head once again in disbelief, she adds, “It makes more sense than it did before.”

  “What’s that?”

  “You and Sarah. She was mourning Bean, sure, but it was odd she was mourning her without you. I mean you two used to be inseparable, but then . . .”

  “Yeah,” I agree. “After the fight with Ace, she showed up at the apartment.”

  “You couldn’t say no.”

  “I couldn’t turn her away.”

  Rae smiles, nudging my shoulder again. “Because you love her.”

  Looking down, I agree, “I do.”

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Sarah

  “HOW LONG HAVE you known him again?” Lacey asks, running her fingers through Liv’s thick dark hair as she sits on her mother’s lap playing with her necklace. Olivia is talking to herself about a cow and a moon. We stopped assuming she was trying to communicate with us long ago and instead we’ve realized she’s probably reciting words from the songs Hayden sings at night to get her to sleep.

  “I don’t know. It’s been a while now,” I tell her as we sit around Trav’s dining room table.

  “And you’re positive you feel safe going out with him? He treats you okay?”

  Her line of questioning already exasperates me. “God, you sound like Ace and Travis! Lacey, it’s a dinner date. People go out together all the time.”

  “I know, I know. Sorry. You’ve never really talked about dating anyone before. None of us really know him. He doesn’t say much when he’s around, and you said before you weren’t dating. Friends only, remember?”

  Lacey wasn’t around when I was younger and tried to have boyfriends. She missed how Ace always created space between me and any boy I liked. He was vicious, threatening, and took pleasure in scaring the shit out them. Now that I’m not living under his thumb, I’m almost free to date whomever I want.

  About two months ago, Ace and I finally grew tired of tiptoeing around each other. Ace’s refusal to see me as an adult finally hit its breaking point. I was tired of being told what to do. He’s always been ridiculous, but Bean was always there to run interference. With her gone, our personalities have started to clash more than ever before. After our last big blowout, which involved me coming home after eleven o’clock one night, Ace and I talked. We agreed it was best I go. Then Ace, without my knowledge, moved forward in finding me somewhere to stay until we were able to be in the same room together without wanting to break something, namely each other.

  Ace didn’t know that his decision to move me temporarily in with Travis, until I could get on my own feet, completely contradicted what he was trying to accomplish. Since Travis and I spent our night together, we’ve become so distant.

  I push, he pulls, both of us refusing to back down.

  “Devon doesn’t say much. But he’s a good guy. We’re still just friends,” I tell Lacey as she continues to stare at me.

  Devon’s been pushing for more for weeks. I’m not exactly sure what “more” means, since I’ve never had an actual relationship. When I told him he could take me out tonight and we’d label it a date, he was far more enthused than I was.

  Lacey quiets, stares down at Liv, and admits, “I’m excited you found someone.”

  “I haven’t found someone, Lace. It’s dinner remember? I just said that.”

  “Whatever. It’s nice to get out of the house with someone else. Travis isn’t a good roommate. Most days, he’s a pain in the ass,” Lacey returns.

  A few minutes later, Travis walks through the door wearing his work uniform. His hands are filthy; a mix of oil and dirt stain his calloused hands. His shirt and pants are soiled with whatever he worked with all day, and holy shit, he stinks.

  “I didn’t know you’d be here.” He greets Lacey carelessly as he walks to her and bends down quickly, keeping his body away from Liv, but kisses the top of his niece’s head.

  “How’s my buddy?” he asks Olivia, but she ignores him and continues looking up at her mom, still mumbling incoherent words and verses.

  Feeling ignored, Lacey interjects, “We’re all doing fine, Travis. Thanks for asking.”

  “Don’t start. I had a shit day.”

  “Don’t you always?” I ask, not serious.

  “Since you’ve moved in? Yeah,” he answers without a smile, heading toward the kitchen to get a beer.

  By now, I know Trav’s routine. After work he comes home, goes to the fridge to grab a beer, showers, then comes out for dinner. If I have to work and haven’t made dinner, he makes his way to the diner where all the other waitresses swoon over his moody ass. Once he leaves, I’m left to answer to each of them why he’s not mine. We aren’t together. Travis belongs to no one.

  “I didn’t cook,” I remind him, knowing he’s probably forgotten about the date I accepted last week.

  “I’ll wait and meet you on your break at work later then,” he says as he opens a new case of beer. His back is to Lacey and me as we continue to sit at the table.

  “You can have dinner with Lettie then. I’m not working tonight, but she is.”

  His head pops up over the refrigerator door and I see his mind turning over scenarios. He’s trying to think of what he forgot.

  “I’m going to dinner with Devon, remember? I told you this yesterday.”

  “No. I don’t remember.” He shuts the refrigerator door with his foot and walks to the entrance of the kitchen to lean against the doorjamb. After taking a pull from his beer, he levels me with a questioning glance. “Why doesn’t he ever come around when we’re here? Is he hiding something?”

  I notice a familiar shade of emotion in Travis’s eyes. He’s angry.

  “Calm down, Travis,” Lacey responds. “Look at yourself. Maybe that’s why he avoids all of us.”

  Ignoring his sister, Travis inquires, “When’s Devon gonna be here and where’s he plan on takin’ you tonight?”

  Lacey catches his annoyance, but doesn’t realize why it’s there. “Wow, big brother,” she states. “You could be nice to him, ya know?”

  “Fuck that. He’s an ass,” Trav replies, looking at me with a murderous glare that makes me more than a little uncomfortable.

  Shit.

  Again, Lacey interjects in attempts to seize the situation. “He’ll be here in less than an hour. If you’re going to avoid him, you should shower because you stink, change because your clothes are soiled, and get going if you can’t play nice.”

  “Right,” he utters in an uneasy tone as he turns around and walks away.

  About twenty minutes later, Liv’s climbing all over me when Raegan walks through the door without knocking.

  “Did I miss anything?” she asks, closing the door behind her. I’m assuming Lacey called her because I didn’t.

  “Trav’s in the shower. We
’re hanging out,” Lacey answers first.

  “Good. So, Sarah . . . where’s Dev taking you tonight?” Raegan situates herself next to Lacey and places her elbows on the table as her hands hold her chin.

  “I don’t know yet.”

  “He’s hot,” Lacey states.

  “He’s okay,” Rae adds in a sullen tone.

  Travis and Rae are tight. Ace used to hate this about them, but with time we’ve all accepted it isn’t changing. They share a common bond cemented by pasts they both hate.

  “No, he’s dreamy hot,” Lacey says in a breathless tone.

  I find it ridiculous she’d swoon over any man, being that she’s married to Hayden. He is about as gorgeous and good-hearted as a man can be.

  I look at Lacey first. “Aren’t you married?” Then I glance at Rae. “And you said Devon was hot before. I’ve heard you say it. Why the change?”

  Lacey giggles, but Rae doesn’t. Her reaction tells me she knows something. Travis opened his mouth; he had to have.

  Damn it.

  “Does he have a job?” Lacey questions next.

  “He’s pre-med. I’ve told you guys this, too.”

  “Is he a good kisser?” Lacey asks another question, but this time I frown.

  “I haven’t kissed him.”

  “Does he like animals? You can tell a lot about a man by whether he’s good with animals or not.” Lacey states, putting the pacifier back in Liv’s mouth after it had fallen on the table.

  “I don’t know. I haven’t asked.”

  “Steer clear of the animals,” Rae says while rolling her eyes. “Dogs mostly. They cost too much.”

  Diamond is Ace’s dog. He initially got the puppy for Rae’s son Decklan, but that dog lives for one purpose—to torment Raegan.

  “I had to go to Victoria’s Secret again to get new underwear. Damn mutt doesn’t stay out of my hamper long enough for me to do laundry. Sick puppy . . . sick, sick, stupid dog.”

  “Harsh, Rae,” I tell her, smiling and relaxing a little bit for the first time since Travis walked in.

  “Does Devon drive a nice car?” Lacey asks.

  Lacey’s twenty questions are wearing me down. I could appease her by telling them how he orders his coffee and his eggs when he comes to see me at work. I could tell her he’s smart, bossy, and appears to go after what he wants. I could say a lot of things, but choose not to.

  “I don’t know what kind of car it is. I didn’t notice. It’s nice, though,” I answer robotically, pulling an invisible piece of lint from my shirt to avoid Rae’s constant stare.

  Lacey sits back in her chair with a look of boredom. “Guess we’ll see for ourselves.”

  “See what for ourselves?” Travis asks, coming out of the bathroom and heading into the kitchen for another beer. I hear the empty bottle hit the trashcan with a heavy thump before he opens the fridge door. I smell his familiar body wash, which I buy because I like it better than the other shit he chose before I moved in.

  Travis completely ignored Rae. That’s a first. I can tell she doesn’t love it either by the way she greets him.

  “Hi, Trav.”

  “Hey,” he answers, then repeats, “See what for ourselves?”

  “Girl talk, Travis.” I try to distract him. I stand and turn from the women who are driving me crazy with questions, and head toward my room.

  Just as I’m about to pass him, his hand darts out and grabs my wrist. I look at my wrist first, then up at him and find he’s looking extremely annoyed, which isn’t unusual.

  “When do you think he’ll bring you home?” The green of his eyes flares with his question.

  Now I’m extremely annoyed. “Seriously?”

  “Yeah, seriously.”

  “When he’s done with me,” I hiss quietly, to avoid Lacey and Rae hearing this ridiculous conversation.

  “When he’s done doing what with you?”

  “Whatever the hell I let him do with me. Let go of my arm, Travis.”

  “He’s not right for you.”

  “Good to know,” I state before pulling my wrist from his grasp.

  * * *

  Travis

  No fuckin’ way.

  It’s not possible.

  I heard the girls talking from the bathroom after my shower. What I heard was bullshit.

  I see Devon as a cocky pretty boy with a God complex. Lacey sees Devon as a successful, smart man with a pretty face.

  Lacey looked fucking mesmerized by his appearance alone. Her eyes widened in surprised when he walked through the door. Rae stood immediately to greet him, but it wasn’t genuine. They both tried to act casual as we waited for Sarah to finish getting ready.

  Devon shook my hand when I offered it, but his return was eager and too certain. He doesn’t hold eye contact worth a shit and barely acknowledged Liv when she pulled on the hem of his jeans for attention. Sarah loves kids, she’s going to have as many as her body will let her, I’m sure of this. She couldn’t bear to ignore them the way he just did.

  “I don’t trust him with our Sarah.” I hear you, Bean, and neither do I.

  “Where you headed with her tonight, Devon?” I ask, folding my arms across my bare chest and resting my ass against the table, crossing my ankles.

  He takes a second to take me in and smirks through his answer. “Dinner, a late movie, and whatever else we find to do.”

  “Bringing her here, to her home, is what ‘else you can find to do.’”

  He smirks again, narrows his eyes too quickly for Lacey, who’s standing at my side, to catch, then says, “That’s up to her, isn’t it?”

  Having Sarah living with me temporarily is one thing. Having us carefully sidestep explosive conversations that make us want to strangle each other is another. Having this prick in my face, unknowingly rubbing in my face the fact Sarah doesn’t want me is just fucking shit.

  Easing off the table, I take two steps, making my way into his space, and lean in. “Careful,” I say with control, but feeling anything but calm.

  “Travis, can you come help me in the kitchen?” Raegan tries, but fails, to get me to leave this alone.

  Stepping back, I notice he’s starting to lose his calm demeanor. “What movie?”

  “I don’t know. Whatever Sarah wants to see, I guess.”

  “Sarah likes gore, a lot of it.”

  Lacey steps near him and pulls Liv from his feet. “Oh she does not, Travis.” She sends me a quick look of embarrassment then gives her attention back to him. “She likes anything. Just take her out and away from big brother here and have a good time.”

  “What the fuck?” Right after I say it, I swear I see him smirk again. And it’s another one at my expense.

  “Would you shut up?” Lacey exclaims loudly to those left in the room.

  “Trav, really, I could use your help in here for a second,” Rae calls again from the kitchen.

  Releasing an annoyed breath, I move toward Raegan in the other room and find she’s not doing anything. She doesn’t need help.

  Grabbing my ear and twisting hard, she hisses viciously, “Did you really not listen to what I said? Space, Travis. Give it to her.”

  Raising my hand and squeezing Rae’s wrist, she releases me. I tell her, more loudly than necessary, “I don’t like this idiot.”

  “Stop,” she says, putting her hand in my face, blocking my view of hers.

  “You see him, right?” I cock my eyebrow, looking down at her then pointing out the obvious a little louder than probably needed. “He’s an asshole, Rae.”

  “Keep your voice down.” She rolls her eyes in disgust. I turn my head to Lacey and watch as she traps him in a conversation he’s not interested in.

  I admit he’s a lot prettier than I am. He’s wearing a dress shirt casually tucked in what looks to be a new pair of jeans, coupled with clean and shiny dress shoes.

  Fuck pretty.

  A few seconds later, I’m still standing in the kitchen near the hallway. I hear, then
see, Sarah breeze in as though she hasn’t a care in the world.

  She’s about to.

  “What the fuck is that?”

  Her goddamn clothes are worse than Rae’s.

  “What?” she snaps back, stopping on her way to the living room.

  “That!” I snap back, pointing to her outfit.

  She’s wearing a minidress that hits mid-thigh—just barely. It’s a black, strapless piece that I’ve only seen her wear once, for about fifteen minutes, since she’s moved in. I made her take it off before we went to meet the others for dinner downtown. She was pissed at my reaction, but I didn’t mind waiting outside for her to change. Her shoes are shiny and black with a heel that adds five inches to her already tall, athletic frame.

  I don’t remember Sarah ever dressing to impress anyone—let alone Mr. Fuckwad who’s waiting for her at the door.

  “You look nice,” Rae adds, removing any meaning behind my insinuation.

  The entire time I’m taking in what she’s wearing, I feel my blood heating in my veins. I’ve never enjoyed Sarah dressed like this, but he will.

  No.

  “Sarah?” I question, waiting for her to answer me.

  “What?” she snaps, using the same tone as before.

  “Can I talk to you?”

  “You want to talk now?” Her words drip with sarcasm.

  All eyes, including Devon’s, come to us as she raises her voice with irritation. But he’s no longer smirking; he’s seething.

  Looking her up and down one last time, I feel my jaw close tight and my body tense with anger, and what I should deny, jealousy. I look at Devon, who’s still staring at us maliciously.

  “Have a nice time,” Rae says, as she nods toward Devon to keep Sarah moving. Looking down, I notice Rae’s hand on my chest. I don’t remember feeling her put it there.

  On her way to Devon, Sarah looks back with narrowed eyes and a furrowed brow. “I’ll see you guys later.”

  Devon doesn’t say anything to any of us as he opens the door for her to exit. The second they’re gone, both Rae and Lacey turn to give me pointed glares of absolute disapproval and shock.

  “What the fuck are you two lookin’ at?” I ask with waning patience.